January 7

Helpless Helplessness

That dull, sick feeling of not being the one at the reins. When did you last feel like that – and what did you do about it?

Helpless

That sick feeling of not being able to sleep or even be fully awake. When every moment of your life is a blur and you are unsure of your waking moments over your sleeping ones. The lines cross over to the point where nothing feels real.

The tears that don’t come and the heartache that poisons your whole body. Pumping the pain from your heart to every cell of your body.

The state of being but not being there. The state of knowing, just not knowing how.

The feeling of utter helplessness that sets in and takes root. Making a home in the centre of your being. The kind of despair that eats through your chest. Making it hard to breathe.

I wish I had an answer for you. A quick fix. I guess I’ll let you know. If I find one.